Archives for November 2011

I worried my blog would be a big downer to everyone now…and it may be to some people, but I met a really sweet reader, Jennifer, at Hobby Lobby yesterday.  She was absolutely the encouragement I needed at that very moment.  I mentioned that I was nervous my blog would be a bummer now and she encouraged me to keep writing just how I felt.  She was such a crazy, wonderful encouragement and a good hugger too.  Thanks so much Jennifer…you made my day.

I thought today…”What about the bright spots?”  What are the things that are making my days a bit better when all I can think about is that my mom is dead.  So here are some of today’s bright spots…in no particular order.

Bright Spot #1:  Harper and Huddy’s mother’s day out pictures.  They are just so stinkin’ cute.  It is small fortune to purchase the pictures, but at least I can stare at these until they have to go back 🙂  I only buy the class picture anyways.

Bright Spot #2:  Visits and chats from friends.  Today my friend Courtney’s mom Sandra came to visit.  Sandra’s husband passed away recently and unexpectedly.  Talking to her was so nice and refreshing.  She even brought lunch, treats and surprises for the kids…a pony painting kit, a Zurg punching bag and Buzz sock em’ boppers.  My kids were immediately fans.

I love when people really want to know how you’re doing.  Thanks so much Sandra.

Bright Spot #3:  Small reminders of my mom, that don’t make me burst into tears 🙂

Like this rock.

I can look at it without crying…and that’s how I prefer to look at things…tear free…you can just see easier.

She gave it to me one Christmas and you couldn’t pay me enough for it.

Bright Spot #4:  Wee Kelley watercolored snowflakes.  Brings on a smile while walking through our kitchen…every single time.

And Bright Spot #5:  Some crafting.  And not just any crafting, but some that pertains to  Random Acts of Kindness Advent.

I beyond loved this idea…sheer brilliance.

I have always had the best of intentions at actually doing advent, but have failed miserably in the past.  So this is the year and we are down right committed this time.

I don’t have a lot of room in our house, so I needed an advent that would not take up much space.  I decided on envelopes and today Harper and I made our official advent envelopes.  Here were our supplies:

Glue sticks, small clips, small paper bags (Hobby Lobby), number stickers, plain paper and patterned paper.

First we covered the front of bags with some patterned paper.

Then we cut out some small circles and added number stickers and then glued the circles to the front of the bags.  Josh and I had brainstormed earlier this week, so I re-wrote our ideas on individual pieces of paper.  I had to modify the original ideas because of the 3 small Kelleys.  Let’s face it…we would be a disaster trying to load someones groceries into their car…they may even pay us to leave them alone 🙂

Harper stuffed the envelopes.

Then I hung up our ribbon and attached the envelopes with the small clips.  Easy cheesy.

I think this will be the perfect way to take our minds off of ourselves and to think of others each day.  In fact, I’m thinking we need to do a random act of kindness every day.

So those are my bright spots for today.  I’m going to keep looking for them.

And seriously, THANK YOU!  Thank you for all the comments and emails and words of encouragement.  You guys are incredibly, crazy nice…and I truly appreciate it.

Turns out life does go on.  The sun continues to rise and set, just as it did before last Sunday.

I had a dear friend who recently lost her dad tell me that after the funeral…that was the hard part.

After everyone goes back to life as it was…like they should…but you are left with the everyday grief that fades quicker for others than for yourself.

Yesterday was a week since my mom died…a week…I still can’t believe it.

And today, well today, was our first day back to life…our new normal.

Josh went to work and I spent the day with the kids and this stubborn sadness that comes and goes like a roller coaster.

My best friend Ashley and some of my aunts and cousins have phrased it like this:

Good moments “I’m up on my mountain”

Bad moments “I’ve fallen off my mountain.”

And in those bad moments they “throw me a rope.”

“You got it”

“Yes.”

“Now climb back up.”

I love good families.

So today was our new normal.

Breakfast.  Honey Nut Cheerios to be exact.

Painting.  Lots and lots of painting.

Scripture.  Much needed scripture.

A new devotional for my kids.  A gift…such a sweet, sweet gift.

Cyber Monday shopping.  Not the deal I wanted…so I didn’t bite.

Harper’s craftiness.  Always in full swing.  Always.

A finished project.  Praise God…a finished project.

Harper’s tree drawing.  I’ll give you one guess as to why I loved this picture so much…A much needed laugh…for sure.

Me:  What’s the big brown circle at the bottom?

Harper:  The dirt clump when you plant a tree.

Makes sense, but sure does look like something other than a tree 🙂

Some compassion and love.

Therapeutic music.  I’m a sucker for some good music.  Coldplay’s Mylo Xyloto = just what I needed.

Play dough snowmen.

Preparing for Christmas cards.

Cousin craftiness.  And lots of it.

New Christmas decor.  Thank you wee Kelleys.

Old school Grinch before bed and waiting…still waiting.  That sweet boy can’t get here fast enough.

Random Acts of Kindness Advent brainstorming between Josh and myself.

  PINNED THIS on my Pinterest and loved it.

And late night Christmas shopping.  I heart extended store hours.

3 kids, 4 nieces and 4 nephews…got to get down to business.

So that was it…our new normal.  Very similar from the pictures to our old normal, but with a missing person behind the scenes.

I am reminded of my mom in almost everything…the phone ringing…she would literally call a million times a day just to chat, pieces of furniture we hunted for together, notes she wrote, buys from the flea market together, Harper’s rain jacket and even small things like laundry detergent and toilet paper she bought up and shared with us.

And so what if I listened to every message on our answering machine today to find her voice.  Scored 7 messages that will never be erased.  That’s normal right?

Life does go on…just in a new way and glad to be reminded that the sun does still rise and set and my Mom’s life didn’t end here.  I get to see her again.  That’s good to know…like real good.

Thank you so much for all the really kind and sweet comments about my mom.

Currently I am getting by…I think everyone in my family is still in shock and I miss her…like a lot…a lot, a lot, a lot.

I’ve started compiling my long list of thank yous.  That should keep me busy for a bit.

I also have cancelled all current orders and I really have no idea when I will re-open.

Harper said to me today, “You need to sew mom.”

I haven’t touched my sewing machine or any art supplies in about 17 days.

That’s a long time.

Today I think I am going to try and finish this little guy.

Sometimes I ask myself if my mom was real…it is just that crazy to me.

I had to call her work voice mail the other day to give myself a reality check.

I have to say, I do feel blessed not to have experienced this kind of pain and sadness before.

29 years without this feeling…I do feel blessed, really really blessed that this is the first time.

“God is good, the world He made is extraordinary and His comfort is like nothing else on earth.”

Thanks for the prayers.

Today I am thankful for my mom.

She was simply amazing.

A life changer for sure.

She went to be with Jesus on Sunday.

Her funeral was yesterday.

The past 2 weeks have been crazy.

I miss her.

But I am thankful for an entire week where I was with her from sun up to sun down.

I am thankful for all the talks and sweet time I spent laid up in her hospital bed right beside her.

Insanely, awesome time with her that I feel was a gift just for me.

I’m thankful for the Grammy she was.

The values she instilled in my children and the quality time she spent with them.

The incredible amount of love she showered them with.

And the prayers she prayed for them.

I am thankful for the woman she was.

A woman who put others needs above her own, kind-hearted, extremely thoughtful, God fearing, a selfless giver.

She was too much fun with an infectious laugh and a personality that was one of a kind.

Gosh I miss her.

So today has been way different than I imagined this Thanksgiving to be.

I skipped out on Thanksgiving lunch and went to the movies with my best friend Ashley.

My mom went to the movies every Thanksgiving.

We mourned with mini slider hotdogs, pizza, popcorn and coke.  This is normal right?

We also did a little retail therapy together at Old Navy.

A mustache kitty cat shirt for Harper equals fantasticness.

I know Ive never, ever mentioned I am an emotional eater :), but I am.

Ashley is too good to me and knew we needed to stop off for another snack.

And tonight I just may hit up Target at midnight with Ashley.

I haven’t been sleeping well, so I may as well experience some Black Friday madness.

Everything feels very surreal still, but I am fully confident that God’s ways are not my ways.

He gets this and He gets how I feel right now.

He gets that I miss my mom.

I am thankful, truly thankful for a mom who loved me like no other and a mighty God who truly gets me.

“This is crazy.”

“This is nuts.”

“Do you believe this?”

Those sentences have been the top spoken sentences in my little world since last Friday.  We are literally stunned.  For those of you who have never had the sheer pleasure of meeting my mom, she is amazing.  She is kind and loving and beyond generous and active and funny and quirky and SO LOVED.  I have never been apart of such an out pouring of love like what has been shown for my mom.  I get phone calls and texts and emails and Facebook messages all day and night about my mom.  Messages of hope, messages of love, people praying for her right then, people sending scripture…it has really been amazing.  My cousin Jan set up a Caring Bridge page for her because so many people want to know how she is doing.  You can see it HERE.

When trying to explain to people what has happened over the last few days it completely blows my mind.  Literally my mom was at the flea market and went to a movie on Friday.  She started having movement issues with her left side during the day on Friday and Friday night she was in the hospital with a brain tumor.  Turns out she had 3 tumors and they were all very aggressive grade 4 glioblastoma.  She had brain surgery Tuesday to remove the tumors…they got 90% which is great.

Tuesday was also our 12th month waiting for our little guy.  The only name we have really been considering for our next sweet boy was also the name of her brain surgeon.  God sent my mom lots of little encouragements like that one.

Yes, I even had our sign at the hospital.  I’ve got to keep it real.

My mom did amazing in surgery.  She was recalling crazy things, like the name of the nurse who was with her right before they put her to sleep (Thelma).  Thelma told my mom all about how she also had a glioblastoma tumor grade 4 a year ago and the same doctor who was working on mom, worked on her.  God cares about small details like an encouraging nurse right before you go in for surgery.

My mom is now experiencing paralysis on her left side, which was expected.  But she is discouraged by this.  She just keeps saying to me, “How did we get here?”  I just keep thinking about how shocked I am and I cannot even imagine and begin to grasp how she is feeling.  She is now going to have to learn how to use her left leg and left arm again.  It is so surreal helping her with her therapy…she is literally learning how to walk again.  She keeps saying, “I just want to be able to walk fast again.”  I am genetically a fast walker…I get my fast walking from my mom…she always seems like she’s on a mission 🙂

So tomorrow she will begin aggressive physical therapy and hopefully in two weeks or so she will be much much stronger and can go home.  Then 2 weeks from now she will begin her chemotherapy and radiation.  After 6 weeks of those, she will begin a trial vaccine that is brand new.  Every doctor we talk with has this look in their eye when they talk about the new trial vaccine…like a kid in a candy shop.  They are all so excited because my mom is the first at this hospital to be apart of the trial.  It’s crazy.  I feel like we are on Gray’s Anatomy.

I have to say that through all of this I am absolutely amazed at my mother.  Is she completely shocked?  Abso-freakin-lutely.  Is she feeling defeated?  Yep!  But her faith has not waivered.  I read her Jesus Calling book to her everyday and she asks me to read her scripture and all the encouraging messages that people keep sending her.  We are all so stunned, but stand firm in the fact that God’s ways are not our ways; His thoughts are not our thoughts.  With all the words of how floored we are, my mom has also spoken “God is good.” just as much.  That is why I am so glad she is my mom.  Nobody can claim her but me and my brother.  She completely blows me away and how God has calmed her and shown Himself to her is even more mind blowing.  His grace is truly, truly sufficient, power perfected in weakness. 2 Cor. 12:9

So now we get down and dirty and get busy whipping cancer’s butt…I wanted to use another word there…I’m feeling ticked off today.  My mom is a pretty tough lady and I look forward to watching her do amazing things in the months and years to come.  We have had so many sweet, sweet messages, but two that have just been completely stuck in my brain are these:

My Aunt Tootsie:  I am reminded of what Vance Havner wrote about Walter Cronkite when he closed his newscast with “and that’s the way it is November 15th 2011.” Vance said he always wanted to answer “No Walter, that’s just the way it looks.” Thank God things are not always the way they look, He is a great God and is certainly capable of pulling off some big surprises. I’m praying for a big one today!

My dear friend Ashley:  …Remember “you were made for such a time as this”.  I love you a lot.  You can do this.  She can do this.  And most of all HE can do this.  He’s got everything under control.

How awesome it is to have such wise and encouraging people in our lives.

So let’s get on with it.  God has the ultimate say and my mom and we are ready to fight and fight hard.  Can’t wait to read this post a year from now and see what God has done.  I expect only big things from such a big and mighty God.  Your prayers for my mom are greatly, crazily and insanely appreciated.

Things do not always go as planned.  I am learning that more and more.  God’s ways are not our ways.  Things happen that only God knows the reasons for, but He gets it and He knows exactly what He is doing.

My mom was at the flea market and the movies on Friday and she is now having brain surgery to remove 3 aggressive grade 4 tumors tomorrow at 1:30.  There will be no 12 Month Waiting Giveaway tomorrow and if you are waiting to hear from me about an email…I will get to it, but it may be a bit.

I am asking you to please, please pray for my sweet mom.  She is a crazy awesome lady and I just like her a lot…like a whole lot.

“God is good, the world He made is extraordinary and His comfort is like nothing else on earth.”

I promise I am still working on orders and I am getting more and more questions about re-opening before Christmas.

First, thank you for all the orders placed and second, thank you for inquiring about ordering.  It still feels crazy good for people to want my art in their homes and to give my things as gifts…CRAZY I tell you.  I feel really, really blessed and our adoption account is overflowing…God gets every bit of glory…every bit.  My lengthy stay with our sweet boy in Ethiopia is currently what we are saving for…so I clearly cannot say thank you enough.

As of right now, I don’t think I am going to be able to re-open again before Christmas.  This is still not an absolute yet…I am giving myself one week to make some major headway and then I will make my final decision.  Life has just become a bit busy with all the approaching holidays and honestly, I want to really enjoy my little family over all the Thanksgiving and Christmas festivities.  I will let you know FOR SURE in about a week.

I have finished up some more orders.  This sweet little penguin tee, 10×10 “Happy Marriage” canvas and 10×10 “Faithful Friends” canvas were ordered by Sarah in California.  Thank you so much Sarah and hope everyone loves their gifts.

This set of key fobs is headed to Jennifer in Hendersonville, Tn.  Thanks so much Jennifer.

This next set of key fobs is headed to Ellen in Knoxville, Tn.  Thanks again Ellen and hope all the Mops ladies love them.

This 5×5 canvas was a donated item…I really like how it turned out.

I have added a few new fabrics to the fabric link above:

In Kelley news…there has been a lot going on…numbers please:

#1 I think I am nesting.  Does this mean that the ever, so longed for call is coming…hmmmm.  I have cleaned out every inch of our house and could have a massive yard sale.  Is November too late?  Best thing about having a small house, you only really have room for the things you need and really love.

#2 Lunch with Josh with only one child is quite peaceful…we did miss the other two though.

#3 Yes, it has begun.  Two wee trees are now up and decorated.  Does it feel weird seeing Christmas tress in my house and we’re not even done with the 2nd week of November?  A little, but the Kelleys are very ready and anticipating Christmas and I know three kids who were beyond thrilled to decorate.

#4  My mom takes each grandkid when they are 2 to Build-a-Bear by themselves.  It was Sol’s turn.  He decided on a bear and he did, in fact, name him Zurg (Grammy was lacking in the spelling department of Zurg’s name).

He is enjoying the box a bit more than the actual bear.

#5  We’re still rockin’ our thankful leaves.

#6  You are still invited to my house.  Read all the details HERE.

You can also call in an order if you cannot make it out.  Shoot me an email at pitterpatterart at gmail dot com if you would like more details.

And everyone who places an order that night will be entered in a drawing for a free custom PPA 12×12 canvas…promise to have it completed before Christmas 🙂  And I will be making up a load of key fobs and everyone who stops by will leave with one…just a “thank you” for supporting such a wonderful group of kiddos in Swaziland.  You don’t want to miss it and I truly would love to meet you!

#7  I will be spending the weekend in Florida with my best friend Ashley.  Josh Kelley gives the best birthday gifts…it’s true.

We’re going to Ikea…I should take a picture of my happy face.

Happy Wednesday!

Warning:  This is a long post filled with awesome mustache love.  If you are not down with the ‘stache do not read any further.

I was invited to a ‘Stache Bash for my birthday.  Are some of you thinking how incredibly awesome this sounds?  Well you are in fact correct.  It was beyond awesome.  Let’s recap the bash.

You know it is going to be one rockin’ party when you are greeted by this:

It was amazing.

Susan and Jen went crazy awesome on the themed decorations.

And my Christmas tree will be ‘stachingly wonderful this year.

There were mustaches everywhere.  Susan is hilarious…every picture in her house was adorned with a ‘stache.  These were my top three favorites.

I even had to do a wardrobe change because I had a party shirt.

The food was so good…Susan’s chili, Melody’s cheese dip and Katy’s mustache cookies.

Tanya was the photographer for the night.  All the pictures that are good in this post are hers.  She rocks.  Check her site out.

And there were also my favorite chocolate with cream cheese icing cupcakes topped with mustaches.

And then if it wasn’t good enough just at that…there was crafting.  What?  Yes, Tanya got Maria and Sam from Sacer and Savive to come and make mustache shirts for everyone.  Maria and Sam were insanely great…the best.  Check out their site and Facebook page.  This was so so fun and extremely hard…deciding on the design…there was lots of thinking and pondering going on.

And then it began…the shirt process…what color shirt, v-neck or round neck, what size, what design, what paint colors, ‘stache placement…it was crazy, crazy, super fun.

I inspected my design closely.

And I loved the end result.

“Rocky top you’ll always be ‘stachetastic to me.  Good ole Rocky Top, Rocky Top Tennessee.”

Then Tanya brought out her photo props and we rocked some photo booth in our new shirts.

This was just as fun as the tees.

And there were presents…such good, great, grand wonderful presents.

And no your eyes are not playing tricks on you…that is in fact, not just one, but two stets of mustache chip clips, a set of fake mustaches, mustache mints, mustache paper clips, a mustache necklace, my Rocky Top mustache tee, a new pair of chucks, a set of earrings and a Target gift card…which I do plan on using to buy all the Icees and popcorn my heart desires.  I also got a giant mustache magnet for my car, but it is on my car…I officially drive the ‘stache mobile 🙂

When the information was leaked that this was going to be a ‘Stache Bash and knowing what I know about the party planners, I knew it was going to be over the top, so I knew I needed to have some ‘stache swag bags ready to say “thank you” with.

Mustache key fobs, mustache hand towels and some 5×5 mustache love canvases.

It was by far my best birthday yet.  Thanks for an amazing party ladies…you really out did yourselves.

After 29, I think 30 is going to be even better.

Happy Monday!