Dear Chocolate No Bake Oatmeal Cookie,

I like you.  You are tasty and delicious.  I have made you hundreds of times since I was a middle schooler and started dating a very cute, tall, maroon dyed hair boy named Josh Kelley who had a Metallica patch sewed onto his backpack.  What else is a young girl to do to win a young boys heart?  Bake his favorite cookie over and over and over again.

I tried you out and learned quickly you were a tricky little thing.  Very temperamental.  Why so temperamental?  Why couldn’t you be like your cousin the Oatmeal Raisin Cookie…easy?  I’ll tell you why, because you are you and you are different and bold and chocolatey.  You put that so-called Oatmeal Raisin Cookie to shame.  No cookie should ever contain a raisin.

I failed many times making you, but my Mom, well, she owned you.  She mastered you.  She made you into the perfect lumpy oatmeal peanut butter consistency every time.  I’m still attempting you and every time you are like a completely different beast.

I made you last night and you were a gooey mess…a gooey hot mess.  Still tasty, but crazy messy to eat.

I made you today and you were a chalky mess…a chalky hot mess.  Still tasty, but a crazy crumbly mess to eat.

Ashley called and I complained about you.  Instead of taking my side, you lured her in with your temptress ways and I ended up giving her your recipe and directions over the phone and you were perfect…the perfect drop cookie you should be every time.  We facetimed and I watched her eat your perfect little cookie self.

Exact same ingredients and a completely different texture each go.  I blame your boil time…it couldn’t be you…your consistent deliciousness is your saving grace.  Dang you boiling time…just a few seconds off here or there and we get a crap texture.  Oh the ups and downs of baking.

I just want you to know that even though you make me want to scream and cuss when I get you wrong, the times when I do get you right completely make up for all the failures.  You really are tasty and delicious and take me back to a most magical time in life.  Thank you for being you.

Sincerely, Laura Kelley