That Time We Went To The Allergist

Today is a better day.  I showed myself some grace and got a hold of my emotions…maybe ate a cookie…or 2…or 3…and today is better.  Thanks for understanding.  Glad to know there are other people who have bad days.  Glad to know I’m not alone in my crazy emotions.

Yesterday we went to the allergist.  Huddy is my allergic kid.  Always has been and it’s looking like always will be.  Since the moment he came into this world with his bowel issues and broken collar bone and cut up head from my small pelvic bone the kid has been on the not-so-typical side.  Allergies and asthma and allergic reactions and eczema.  He was even hospitalized when he was a baby because of how severe is eczema was.  Who gets hospitalized for eczema?  Our kid, that’s who.

He’s been having severe asthma lately…telling us he thinks he’s going to die.  Like days of trying to get it under control with steroids and his inhaler and breathing treatments.  He also loves food.  There is not much Hudson Kelley will not eat, so when he started turning down cheese, chocolate and ice cream we knew something was up.  He also puked his guts up after a new blueberry granola bar which he was super pumped about.  We finally decided it was time to get him legit, skin allergy tested.  We’ve done the blood tests, lots of times, but it was time to get down to business for reals.

I’ll go ahead and place the blame on me for how the appointment went.  It was hellish.  Harper, Huddy and Sol are sweet little pieces of chocolate cake at any doctors appointments.  They know the rules.  We can communicate with each other and they know what I expect from them.  They are easy.  But then throw in Amon…our wildly wild, struggling to communicate child and should have known what the 2 1/2 hour appointment would hold.  Holy flippin’ moly.  Let’s discuss a few of the highlights:

-Amon is apparently really not so great at being trapped in a small doctors room for an extended period of time.  Any time I tried picking him up, he would just scream and squirm and fight like mad to get down.  He just wanted to be down and wreak his little havoc.  Was that too much to ask…to raise all sorts of hell in the allergists office?  Apparently so.

-The nurse who we spent most of the time with displayed not much personality or even the slightest bit of tolerance for kids.  I have drawn the conclusion that she and Amon would probably be arch nemesis.  No smiles.  No comments pertaining to or related to kids.  Nothing.  Strictly business.  She was totally annoyed with us.

-Amon only wanted to stand in each of the tiny little chairs at the child sized card table.  And then try and jump off.  Don’t be fooled by this picture.  Shortly after he was standing and ready to fling his small body into the air whether I caught him or not.

-When the doctor, who was super nice, would come in and chat, Amon would wedge himself in between the doctor and the tiny card table and then proceed to take any treasure the doctor had in his coat pocket.  #littlethief

-Amon also got in quite a bit of typing skillz when the doctor, whose computer was just close enough to the edge of the counter, would be checking Huddy out.  I would be watching and focussed on Huddy, trying to listen to what the doctor was saying, and then I would hear hands banging on his key board.  Busted.

-Another time, as I was trying to listen to the doctor give me important information, Amon stood on one of the little chairs and then tried hoisting himself onto the window sill above to try and reach a box of books.  It’s hard to pay attention to someone talk as you watch your toddler try and pull a clip hanger.

-See that purple basket on the window sill in the picture above?  Yep, it’s full of crayons.  Oh, why yes, Amon did dump the entire bucket out onto the floor and that is why it is on the window sill.

-While the nurse, who keep in mind doesn’t seem to enjoy the craziness Amon is bringing to this appointment, is poking Huddy with about 16 different possible allergies, Amon proceeds to take our stroller and run it into the back of  her legs…over and over and over.

-While Amon is running the nurse over, Huddy is crying his little eyes out because the said, “it’s just going to feel like a tooth pick is giving you a little poke” skin test, clearly does not just feel like just a little poke from a toothpick.  I did my best to manage Amon, the heel killer, and sweet Huddy.  I wanted to throw that dang umbrella stroller through the window.

-Amon not only got into the regular trash can in the office, but yes, also the biohazard trash can as well.  I wanted to dip his entire body in a huge bath of sanitizer.  He also tried pulling that bright red trash liner completely out of the trash can casing.  Pretty sure Amon could be classified as a biohazard himself.

-Throw in lots of screaming because Amon just wanted out of the little room.  Out I say, out.  Exhibit A, B & C.  I should tag them crying, blurry and snotty.

What was Sol doing this whole time?  Chillin’.  It’s how he rolls.  Huddy was even chillin’ too…after the initial burning and itching finally subsided.

Afterwards, when we finally made it to the car, I took a big deep breath, shed some tears and then let Huddy pick any place he wanted to eat for lunch.  He wanted pizza and he asked if we could eat at an actual pizza place.  Pizza Hut it was.  It was the best dang pizza I’ve ever had.  Who cares if the joint was super creepers…dim lighting, bad old school music, sketchy looking folks including us, super sticky table…it was perfect.  Our waitress was super nice…I think she could tell I’d had a rough day so far.  In order to keep Amon from flippin’ his lid while we waited for our pizza, she let me get him a plate of food from the buffet for free.  She’s my hero.

I’ve learned my lesson.  Amon is no longer allowed at the allergist.  Personally, I was just super thankful there wasn’t a toilet in the room with us.

Happy Thursday!

***UPDATE…I’m well aware of the hilarity in the insanity.  I laughed about the train wreck our appointment was.  I still laugh.  I re-laughed when I wrote this.  Josh Kelley laughed too.  It is wildly funny.  Feel free to laugh along with us.***