Currently…

Listening:  A little old school Mat Kearney.  Ummmm, when he covers Breathe In Breathe Out…swoon city people.  Death by memories and a wonderfully sappy song.  Give me all the emotional songs…I love them all.

Eating:  Shockingly nothing as of this minute.  I will be taste testing some chocolate chip halloween cookies in a bit though. Yes they are the same chocolate chip cookies I’ve made a gazillion times and that I’ve already made once this week, but these have those eyeball rolos on them and yeah, I need to make sure they’re not poisonous.  It’s my public duty.

Drinking:  Agua.  Always and forever.

Wearing:  PJs.

Feeling:  A bit emotional.  I attended the funeral and burial of my friend’s dad today.  He’s buried in Mom’s cemetery so it was just all a bit surreal and bizarre.  I see and feel funerals so much differently now.  In a good way, but different.  And my heart just wants to crack in two for my friend.  Death blows, but thank God for Jesus and the cross.

Weather:  It was seriously the most perfect fall day.  Couldn’t have been prettier….crazy blue sky and trees on fire.

Wanting:  Crossing my fingers and toes a certain package I’ve been waiting for arrives tomorrow.  I have some birthday love to share and I need this package to appear tomorrow.  Today would have been even more awesome, but I’ll take tomorrow too.  Mom’s death has taught me holidays and celebrations are so much better when you share the love instead of keeping it all for yourself.  Go and love…the world needs more of it.

Needing:  Easily sleep.  Lots and lots of luxurious sleep.  Actually, any sleep will do.

Thinking:  A thousand things.  A string of thoughts…I wonder how much weight I’ve gained over the past few weeks from all my sweet emotional eating…I desperately wish I could remember more details about Mom’s death/funeral/burial because it’s mostly all a blur now…<—-how morbid and crazy am I…wish I was going to hit 50 miles running this month like I’d plan, but I’m coming up short…I love Halloween…I cannot believe November is here…I wonder when we’ll get “the call” because currently every time a strange number shows up on my phone my stomach churns…I want joy-lots and lots of joy…I should probably try a cookie now.

Enjoying:  Friends who can relate to grief.  There is a crazy comfort in people who are honest and real and just understand the suck-tasticness of losing a loved one.  Goh, you guys are never coming back tomorrow because of my rainbows and unicorns and lollipops…oh and death talk.  I know how to bring a room down 🙂

Also, answered prayers.  A friend got awesome news today…like something she and I have been praying for for so long and I seriously cannot quit thinking about how awesome God is…how good and merciful and gracious and loving.  Absolutely floors me.  Could not be more thankful for this answered prayer.

And that’s it. Just sitting in our kitchen floor waiting for the last pan of cookies to come out of the oven and then I am GOING TO BED!!!!  Bring on the sleep.  Give me all the sleep.

Peace.

3 Comments

  1. Aunt Tootsie says:

    Laura, what is the eye ball made of? Looks like an M & M on the very top, what’s the white?

  2. Hey Aunt Tootsie…the chocolate bottom part is a rolo and the eye ball on top is a candy eye from Joanns. They come in a big pack with like a million candy eyes. No m&ms. Love you!

  3. I’m behind on my blog reading, so I’m just now reading this, but I can relate to all of the grief talk. My dad passed away 4 weeks ago today and I keep replaying everything over in my head, so I don’t forget it. His funeral was so awesome that I wish someone had recorded it. I guess that would’ve been weird, but family and friends told such wonderful stories about him and I want to remember those stories forever. : )

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